Learning to Swim

i would like to say
that these have been the best days since i've lost you
but it simply wouldn't be true
mostly it's just business as usual
with little hunger pangs
and random spurts of sadness.
im nowhere near depressed
but i do smile a little bit less.
the other day someone said i looked somber.
i've never been called that before.
but i've been feeling that way just a little bit more.
this hasn't been as easy or as hard as i imagined.
lost love, i suppose, isn't really something to be fathomed.
until you feel 100 leagues under the sea
without the slightest bit of buoyancy.
im on top mostly drifting on a raft,
but times do come when im drowning,
drowning on the past.

Pretty Lady (Or Retch)

the very thought makes me sick to my stomach.

nauseous at

the fact that

you aren't mine

and could potentially be

someone else's

"pretty lady"

Still in Love

you make my face hurt.
like when i watch a baby laugh,
i can't stop smiling.
and the burning
in my cheeks
combined with the
anti-gravity of my lips
tells me
that the joy you gift to me
is like none other.
by just being,
we laugh and break in to fits of giggles.
like little kids,
running nowhere,
for no reason
simply because they've been told
to "Go out and play."
you make me want to
ignore caution
and believe in possibility
we might be destiny
or maybe something lesser
but i know the best of me
is in you
trapped behind your
sparkling teeth
and those shiny eyes.

Real World Vow (+End)

This is a man's world
Time to cut the boyish shit
Adulthood has been here long
And I have just been avoiding it
Getting my Peter Pan on
And on
And on
It's time to end that story
Move forward
Snip my ties
To young society
And tie my ties
For the sake of propriety
Here's where I decide
To leave the past
I knew inside my heart that wouldn't last
Forever
However
Let it be known
That although I'm going off on my own...

I'm changing
But in the future whoever I become,
Whoever i am
Je t'aime,
My love,
Je t'aime.

A Moment of Weakness

This train of thought

Is gonna leave me derailed

Like a lawyer

Tryna find himself

In a job of retail

I'm Phoenix Wright, right?

So my Phoenix Righteousness

Should be like the dust

And all over me

Unfortunately

It seems it's finally

Got one over me

Has me hostage

And my kidnapping

Comes complete with a holding fee

That I honestly

Can't afford at the moment

Life seems like a bitch now don't it?

Mine is lonely

And I don't even own it

I want to

Know about ya day

But I can't say so

Because my pride always says no

And a part of me

Couldn't take it

If you were really doing fine

Spending time doing other things

When we used to talk online

I'm confused and conflicted

Had my ice cream and i licked it once

Before it fell on the ground

Now I know I can't pick it up

There's a Lost

Without Found

I highly doubt

There's any coming back

So I just gotta brave it

And be ready for these attacks

I keep clicking on your picture

Like it's gonna say hello

And even as I do

My logic says hell no

But that's OK

Or it'll have to be

It's a lot harder then I thought

To make you the past to me

Nah Right

fuck what *needs* to be done
if im fuckin doin shit, it NEEDS to be fun
im only human
so it follows that im lonely
and a humanist
(only as much as any other human is)
as well as hedonistic
so i enjoy when chicks toy wit my dick
and leave the tip dipped in lipstick
that's sort of inappropriate
but i'll appropriate and take
whatever chance that comes my way
to say things that are out of place
im the spacebar speedin in between
sentences like a race car
lay me down deep to rest
when it's my time
and let it be read on my tomb
"He had a much too much fun
ignoring that fine line."

Silenced Temptation

slightly enticed
by those cold eyes of ice
i know it's not right
but this girl
might be my plight
she's skyrocket tall
had to squint to see her beauty
put my glasses on
i could tell she was a cutie
had me tempted to touch
or at least ask her to lunch
i wanted to ask her a lot
so i figured that's really not much
she keeps smiling at me
she might be a tease
i don't really mind
cuz i quite like her teeth
they're sparkly and white
and she smiles with her eyes
she might just be acting
(that sounds better then lies)
but i won't be surprised
if she agreed to go eat
but that would mean many things
that really aren't me
so ill just stare at the sun
and keep on daydreaming